Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Um excuse me, your cow is dead.


So instead of me trying to explain the situation I’ll just give you an idea on how the conversation went between me (the INNOCENT one who just thought the cow was “sleeping”) and the owner of the cow:

Ring ring…ring ring…
Owner: hello?
Me: uh, yeah, er..uh hmm, er this is Vanessa.
Owner: oh hi Vanessa what can I do for you?
Me: uh er…well…
Owner: silence
Me: well you know how your cows are in my pasture and they eat the grass, and drink water, and walk around all cute, they really are cute…anyways, you know how they moo, and are like oh I don’t know breathing and alive usually…well one’s not.
Owner: oh?
Me: yeah I mean it was walking around yesterday you know all cute, did I mention they are soooo cute? Yeah, well anyways…yesterday it was walking around and this morning when I went to go to the gym I noticed one was grazing and the other wasn’t, it looked so peaceful and sleepy so I went on my merry way and didn’t think anything of it.
Owner: oh?
Me: yeah and I didn’t really think about it till I was outside again in the backyard after dinner and I thought to myself “ha that’s funny, that cow is still sleeping in the same exact position as it was this morning…it must sure be tired”
Owner: oh…
Me: so I went to go check on it just to make sure…and yeah I don’t think it’s alive anymore…
Owner: oh okay I’ll go get my husband to go take care of it later tonight…
Me: that’s it? “Oh okay” no “did you give it Kool-Aid?” Or I don’t know “chase it up and down the street last week when your kids let them out on “accident”?” I mean what if it had a weak heart and I made it exercise too much or something?!!!
Owner: oh I don’t think so, it’s the little one right?
Me: yeah the smaller of the two
Owner: oh no it had problems from the start, so you didn’t do anything to it I’m sure.
Me: oh okay…well I’m really sorry…I like the still breathing one better anyways…

So aside from killing cows in my pasture I’ve been reading up a storm the count is 3 books in 4 days…it all started when I joined the gym and got on the treadmill…I’m a multitasker so I started reading a book…well three books down and onto my 4th…I have been working on the house in between reading so at least that’s getting done…but as for sewing...not so much right now. But I’m working on a new skirt for me and finishing up my fall quilt today! That is the plan at least…we’ll see how it all plays out

14 comments:

rachel griffith said...

oh my gosh.
you killed a cow!!!
:D

what a day.

wow...you are SO power reading.
what did you read so far???

haley said...

wow, you can decorate, sew, read like a maniac and kill cows... now that's talent!!!!

Jenny said...

Oh my goodness, that's too funny! Glad to hear it (probably) wasn't anything you did. ;) Whatcha been reading?

girlsmama said...

Well that's one to add to the srapbook. And I'm sure it was nothing you did...

SLO Rober said...

Gee. I can't even get the nerve up to tell my neighbor their dog keeps pooping in my yard. Way to go!(tee hee!)

V and Co. said...

what i've read: the last of the poison study books "fire study"
then i ready "a great and terrible beauty" that ones really good. then i had to wait a day to get my 2nd and 3rd of the series so i read "sunday at tiffany's" by james patterson. and today i started "rebel angels" which is the second one to "a great and terrible beauty"

Cannon Clan said...

v that is so funny! glad your neighbors took it so well!

Marie said...

Vanessa that is so funny. Remind me not to leave the kids with you. haha

Rachel H. said...

Maybe you could advertise your field for rent to put any animals people might want "gone"... :) Good way to make an extra buck, and they clean up the mess. jk!

Mel and Byde said...

Vanessa-
I gave you an award on my blog. Stop over and check it out :)

Nicole said...

Oh, poor cute cow. Remember how I told you I worked at sew n' save? One time the owner came to pick me up for work and was so sad. I guess she had become really attached to the cow in the pasture by her house. Well, apparently she'd found out they were going to take it to the slaughter. She was seriously trying to talk her hubby into buying it for her. She told me all about her pretty brown eyes and how when she would say, "hey cow" it would respond to her. It was such a crack up to hear her story of her cow.

EmmaP said...

too funny! I found your blog through Melanie! Thanks for the laugh! - a dead cow - seriously!

Kara said...

If I can read one book in 4 weeks that is an accomplishment! And way to kill a cow!

Cherry's Jubilee said...

Roflmmbo...........ok I know I don't like know you but cow killer doesn't ever come to mind. Nope. Rofl...you are funny...love your stories. You are my own personal hero if you can excerise and read at the same time...whoa. cherry

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